Sad...or happy?

Some days are really sad....and some are happy, and others are a mixture.
But somehow I have a feeling that most of our days are meant to be sad. Not sad as in crying, weeping and depressed sad. But sad as in reflecting on the misfortune of others, on the tragedies in life...on the meaning of life, and what we're supposed to learn from our experiences.....that's not real sadness, but I call it sad....I don't know why?? Maybe because when I'm in that reflective mood, most of the time I become sad.......or maybe because we're surrounded by sadness most of the time now.
I look around me and find young people dying just because they happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. I see my country suffocating beneath the weight of oppression, terrorism, and discrimination. I see people rising in the early morning to go earn a decent living for their children and having their dreams crushed because they can't afford to realize them. I see young men frustrated because they don't see a light at the end of the tunnel. And young women confused because they don't really understand what's happening around them. I see anger, frustration and defeat. I see people dying so young because they don't have the money to get treatment for cancer or heart disease. I see people fighting and killing each other in the name of religion. I see people too busy to give a damn about each other.
What happened?? Are my glasses too dark, or is this the truth? I am not a pessimist by nature; I alway manage to see the full half of the cup. I always try to find the best in the worst situation. Ok, some one please point out to me the best......now!

Have you ever thought,
what you mean to me?
Have you ever known,
how much you can hurt me?
Do you even care??

Terrorism........Damn you!

I am too upset to write anything further.

Missing you..................

A day comes by, and a day passes
The pain is there.....everlasting.....

Daydreaming - Be careful what you wish for.......

A female spends more than three quarters of her life daydreaming. Of course, that's not statistically correct, that' s just my personal opinion. We daydream about the knight in shining armour, we daydream about a day at the spa, or of a new magical pill that will make us lose all those extra pounds...........we daydream of a life where everything is perfect, just the way we like it. Well, is it healthy? To a certain extent of course; afterall, it's a place where we can just forget all about our everyday worries, where we are happy because everything is going the way we plan.......for a few minutes at least, and then we're back to reality and the cycle continues.
I was very big on daydreaming......did all the time, at school, after school, at university, at work, at home...everywhere. Those precious few minutes where the hottest guy in school has actually chosen me to take to the prom.....or where I've aced all my exams and come in the top ten in university, or where my heart has beaten for the first time and the feeling is reciprocated, or where top management has suddenly decided that I am management material and I definitely need to be promoted.....that was taking it to the limit, don't you think...:) But seriously, haven't we all gone through that...haven't we all tailored our dreams to be the perfect, unblemished clone of our reality? Don't we always have a solution in our dreams to whatever is going wrong in our life? But you know what?? maybe that's not always a good thing.....
There's a real life story I read in a newspaper a while back, that has remained with me since then, and has affected very much my idea of daydreaming. A woman wrote that she has been married to her husband for 15 years and that they were very much in love. Ten years into their marriage, her husband had an accident that left him crippled and unable to work. So, with three kids to feed and send to school, she had to go out to work to provide for the family, as her husband was unable to find work suitable to his condition. Her days began very early, where she had to go to work, come back late in the afternoon, cook, clean, do the laundry, help the kids with their homework, and spend time with her husband, who was always grouchy because of the guilt and complicated feelings that came with someone going through such an ordeal. He was also unable to perform his marital duties. She was worn out physically and emotionally. Her only moments of peace were right before she fell asleep. She used to daydream to escape her reality. Her day dream was the same every day. She used to dream that her husband had died- not divorced him because she loved him and would never divorce him- and that a very wealthy man had showed up right after that to tell her that he had loved her for a long time and wanted to marry her. She would agree to marry him, leave work, get servants, buy lots of clothes and jewellery, send her children to the best schools, and enjoy a wonderful and loving relationship with her new husband. Her dream would end every day on that happy note, and she would fall asleep peacefully.
Suddenly, her husband died.......... not in her daydream, but in her real life. And she was devastated. She could not function, she felt that her whole world had collapsed. The love of her life had died....the father of her children.........her companion of fifteen years....the only man she ever wanted. And she remembered her day dream........and the guilt was just about enough to kill her.
Of course, the editor of the newspaper tried to tell her not to feel bad, that there was no way she could've known that this would happen, and so on. But the story touched me so much.....I wanted to reach out to this woman, I wanted to take the pain away.....but I couldn't of course. No body could.....she had to make peace with herself on her own........I don't judge her for having that dream......I don't think that she is a bad person............I never really believed that she wanted her husband to die. I know that it was only a dream to escape........just like all our day dreams......we were just lucky......our dreams did not come true.....
Unfortunately, hers did........